40 years on

This weekend I attended my 40th Blackford High School reunion. It was a blast, but in that "you hadda be there" kind of way. 

If you haven't gone to one of your high school reunions, I'm sure you have your reasons. But if those reasons include any notion that the popular kids will still snub you—or that you are still embarrassed about being one of the popular kids who snubbed the others, please reconsider. Time heals all wounds.

Every one of us in adolescence is looking for a place to fit in. Some fit into athletics, some into academic (or theatre arts!) stardom, some quietly into the back row. But 40 years on, or even 20 years on, no one cares about that anymore. Every single one of your classmates lucky enough to still be living has experienced the ups and downs of life. All they care about is reconnecting with that group of people who were shipmates on the turbulent seas of teenagery. There is a primal connection, for some reason. A shared understanding of the time, for sure: the (now old) fashions, songs, trends, escapades. But more than that, it's like reconnecting with extended family, in a way. These are people who saw you at your gawkiest, your pimpliest, your most insecure times. And you know what? They want to see you now, as much as you want to see them. 

One girlfriend whom I haven't seen for 37 years got in the car with me and we drove over to look at our old neighborhood in San Jose. We took pictures of the houses we grew up in. We drove by the old middle school, and the campus where our high school stood. We thought about revving up the engine and squealing out in the parking lot, but not seriously. Wave after wave of memories came, but we weren't living in the past. Instead, we were reviewing and sifting those stories through the prism of our accumulated experiences. We have the perspective now to file those times where they fit. We can always haul them out again should the mood strike.

So, next time one of your reunions rolls around, go. Have fun. Hug those old friends and frenemies, and laugh until you cry. You won't regret it.

I sure had fun, and I have the laryngitis to prove it.

Comments

[mossum]

Still waiting to see those reunion pix. Oddly, I remember the people in your year better than those in mine!